I'm back (through the grand entrance)!

I secretly told my inner self to stop writing, I thought there's nothing left in me to pour my heart out. What's the point anyway? Things would not change...

I forgot that at the very least, this is the only place I could be sincere to myself, a place where when I revisit again and again, I would be reminded of how, who, where and what I was. I do not have to worry about minding my words and thoughts. I can be in peace with myself here. This is my world (although virtual)...

So where have I gone? Too far, I guess.

In this trying time, I have been abused by nobody but me. I am still craving and wanting, with eyes wide open knowing that there's no one left to call and nowhere else to go. I was all alone, helpless, in my own paranoia that people laugh at my failure, that the world turns its back on me, and that even love hates me..!

I was dancing in the dark. Alone.

But I want this to end. I have to write, even if it is a death note. I have to feed my lonely soul. I have to live my life no matter how, come what may I need to pull through and be stronger. This is indeed my self-audit engine!