What ever had happened to the traffic flow in the city lately? People are being inconsiderate while driving, slow drivers are making ways shooing us away from the 3 lanes highways, unreliable traffic officers controlling the traffic flow (they are much better in bartering, issuing tickets or proposing a fund-raising for their coffee break endowment), undecided and lost 'treasure-hunters' are all over the town.
The truth is, I cannot understand why some people must have this 'lack of urgency' attitude. I am not asking them to rush it all the way, but at the very least all they can do is not acting like they are the only one on the road, holidaying and enjoying the scenery of the rock jungle in the city to the extent that they disregard to pick up the pace when the light turns green! Worst scenario, when it comes to your turn it is already too late because you are made immovable again for a horrible 5 minutes when the light goes red!
Are these to-name-a-few situations suggesting me being an impatient, intolerant driver? But, on a second thought, would there be road-bullies if they were not provoked in some ways in the first place? If that is the case, maybe I should opt for 'incidental, provoked road bully' for my driving style.
As a result, I arrived home from work quite late, feeling distraught at the maximum level when I had to fight my way through the rush hour begging to myself for a smooth driving experience, which of course can never be a reality.When I entered the living room, to my surprise, a delicate scent, which is so familiar, struck my nose. I wondered if my flat mate was around, but he was nowhere to be found. And it never came across my conscious mind that he would shower himself with 'that' scent, not in a zillion years! He would use something more 'mannish' according to his own interpretation to express his very own macho-ness and masculinity. Yeah, whatever!
A logic justification would be someone that I knew had come by earlier. The familiar scent, and the aura of existence that caused instant chaotic heartbeat to me the moment I stepped into the house told me that that 'someone' was actually there in my house. My mind began to involuntarily entered the purposely-untouched area inside my brain, revisited the restricted area which I hope to be seized forever the moment I saw the unwanted, heart-breaking incident on that eye-opening, fateful day.
Whilst feeling a sudden electric shock-like, I sat down, trying to catch a deep breath (and by doing so I actually inhaled the delicate scent more into my entire body until it became part of me, and I never wanted it to vanish,ever). After some sense and 'stability' regained, I decided to take a shower and let the water flow all over my body and rinse myself off of my yesterdays.
Upon entering my bedroom, there it was, laid on my recently bought tempered glass magazine rack, a piece of white color paper, cut in a rushing manner into a quarter size of an A4, with a note on it. I picked it up and read it out loud.
Sampai rumah you sudah. XXX
Well, someone was really, really there, indeed. I cannot help but to wonder, was it a good or a bad omen? Is it going to be forever like this, that the spirit of that someone will haunt me for the rest of my life, or am I the one who is actually haunted by my own self? Is there a possibility for a relationship to bloom for the second time? Then again, why am I hoping for things to change? Why do I have to allow myself to be exposed to another certain heartbreak, feeling hurt even more than now? Could there be light at the end of this tunnel, or is it just a dead end?
I reread the note. I felt and saw a smile on my face. Suddenly all the troubles I went through while driving home did not matter to me anymore. I began to understand that life's like that; sometimes you have to go through all the troubles only to find peace and comfort in your own haven at the end of the day.
In my case, I found peace inside me...not to be bothered by someone, or anyone (hopefully).
May God give you a rainbow for each storm, a smile for each tear, a blessing for each trial, a song for each sigh, an answer to each prayer, and a sweet dream for each night...
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